Pineapple on Pizza. If there has ever been a more senseless debate, I would love to hear it. In recent years people have rallied around being either pro pineapple or anti pineapple faster than picking a handsome boy team to cheer for after the Twilight films. It’s a debate that’s ruined friendships and probably caused a few divorces or break ups too…
Just as with most Internet debates, there are a million other things people could rather be arguing about. Personally I don’t see what the problem is when there are so many other much worse toppings for pizza.
I mean why does banana get the all clear? Sure it may not have as high moisture content as pineapple and perhaps it mixes better with Mozzarella, but it still adds sweetness, just like pineapple, that goes great with many meats.
It doesn’t just come down to personal tastes, but personal freedoms. What kind of totalitarian dictator of pizza would judge another person for what they put on their piping hot pizza? So with that in mind let’s look at some terrible pizza toppings that deserve way more hate than Pineapple does.
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Sardines And Anchovies
While these tiny salted fish can be found in pizzas across the globe, most people are not huge fans of their pizzas smelling like the beach at low tide.
These fishy toppings can’t be sensibly paired with anything, and they completely dominate the flavour profile of any pizza they are added to. I am sure you can find more people that would eat a pineapple pizza than an anchovy or sardine pizza.
From kangaroo to crocodile, different cultures have added many different exotic meats to their pizza. While not inherently wrong, the gamey taste of most exotic meats simply don’t work with the flavour combinations of a traditional pizza.
These toppings are probably acceptable as a novelty, but no Pizza chain would be able to make a living from these mystery flavour meats.
A popular topping in Costa Rica, coconut is used to mellow out harsh flavours and adds a hint of sweetness.
Most commonly paired with shrimp, coconut is quite a rarity on pizza in the rest of the world.
Ok, so other than the moisture content and cheese aversion most people claim as the reason they don’t like pineapple on their pizza, most would claim the sweetness is not right, yet banana on pizza somehow makes the grade.
This is fruitism of the highest calibre. Banana is way more distinct flavour to place on pizza and it dominates the flavour profile just as much as a pineapple chunk.
So, if by now you still feel pineapple is the worst topping, it may just be time to admit to yourself that you don’t actually like pizza! Or that pineapple is the victim of a smear campaign, when really; there are far worse flavour combinations to choose from.